We’ve all been there. The day’s been long and you have to make dinner. Great, another chance for your child to reject what you’ve made for dinner. You feel completely defeated on top of being exhausted. What’s a parent to do? Well, believe it or not, one thing that works great is to include your child in meal prep and serving. Yep, I said it, let them help.
If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a million times, kids learn about foods by looking at them, touching them, smelling them and just interacting with them. Now, that doesn’t mean it’s a free for all in the kitchen. It doesn’t mean handing your 3 year old a raw chicken breast and letting them go all Top Chef on it. What it does mean though is giving them some input in the meal. One way to do this is to let them pick one food to serve with the meal. Give them a little power and a voice. You help them with their food to prep and then they help you. Here’s an example. You’re making baked chicken and rice for dinner. Your 3 year old says “ewww chicken. I don’t like chicken.” You tell them “okay, that’s what I picked for our family eat for dinner what do you choose?” Your 3 year old as defiant as ever chooses goldfish crackers. Now, is goldfish crackers what you think goes with baked chicken and rice? No, probably not but does it really matter? I would say no, as long as you have some guidelines around it. You don’t want them eating 2 cups of fish crackers and skipping the chicken. This is where I like to use the box and look at what is a serving. Tell your kiddo “okay great. Let’s give everyone one serving of goldfish. Will you help me count? The box says one serving is 20 crackers. Let’s count. One, two, three…”
Another thing that works well at meals is an “all done bowl/plate.” If you child is a picky eater and won’t eat what you’re having for dinner, change the expectation. Ideally you would put a bite or two of what you are eating on their plate. This gives them the opportunity to smell, touch, see and feel the food. If they absolutely won’t allow it on their plate, give them a separate plate with your food on it. I like to call this a “no thank you plate.” Regardless of it is on their plate or a “no thank you plate” the goal should be that they allow it to sit there while the family is eating. When the meal is done they should be encouraged to pick it up and put it in the “all done bowl/plate.” In a dream world they take a taste first but if that is too hard, try having them kiss it goodbye and then putting it in the “all done bowl/plate.”
One of the most important things to include in family meals is conversation. Sitting down around the table together is the perfect time to work on learning to eat new foods, but it is also a great time to work on speech and language skills. How do you do this? Two words. No. Screens. When iPads, televisions, computers, etc are at meals kids are learning about what they are watching not about the food in front of them or the people around the table. Remember to keep the language you use with your kids the level that they are. So, for our littles use one or two words. Words like “eat, yummy, more, all done, milk, cracker, cup, bowl, plate, mine, yours, etc.” For older kids, try concepts like hot and cold, figure out what food group the foods are in, talk about what they ate at school or what other kids ate, talk about what they did at school, etc. One of my favorite things to do was to go around the table with a sentence starter of “the best part of my day today was _____” and “the worst part of my day today was _____.” Listening to how these changed from the preschool years to the high school years is honestly one of my favorite parts of my day.
Finally with meals, one of the biggest recommendations I have is to have your child clear their own place at the table. Now, this doesn’t mean handing your 2 year old your best china plate but maybe they throw away their napkin or carry their cup to the kitchen. I do this with all the kids I work with regardless of age or ability. Clearing your place is a fabulous way to learn about the sight, smell, taste and feel of food, but it is also part of being in a family. Teamwork makes the dream work.
If the idea of doing any of these things with your child makes you want to cry or if your child is such a picky eater you don’t even know where to start, call us at Family Chatterbox. We are here to help!
-Tricia